my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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