is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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