he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
we should paint friendship bongs
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