What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
