Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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