Soap is not a condiment
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
