she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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