I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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