butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
