Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I need a beard to bite.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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