youre lurking in front of me
i need an iv and a liver transplant
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Randomize
