i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I'm both gender and math confused
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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