It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Randomize
