I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
