I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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