I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
