talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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