Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Randomize
