I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize
