I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
we're making bets on your personal life
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
