You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
false alarm. still invincible.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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