i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
