You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
