I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize