okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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