dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
