your thong is hanging out like whoa
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
