maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
