like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize