Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Randomize
