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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  what did you do?

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  i asked her out. that's so hot.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.

  (1-706): View more from Georgia

  Where the hell are you

  (706): View more from Georgia

  He's winning.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.

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• (212): View more from New York

  I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!

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