Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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