dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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