she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
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