I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
