you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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