did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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