you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
