she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize