lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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