Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize