What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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