Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
