You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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