On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
