I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
