hotel room ftw
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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