Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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