Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
