Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
